Testing Fate, Testing Faith

This is my first post.  It is an auspicious day.  I am thankful for this day and this opportunity to share my reflections - my musings - on life.  I hope you will share this journey with me.  If so, may we learn from one another and transform our lives.  And so it begins…

Last week I was ill with a cold or flu.  Illness, to me, is a reminder to slow down and reflect on what is truly important.  As I lay in bed thinking (what else are you gonna do when not sleeping) I was reminded of another time in my life when I was spending a lot of time in bed due to illness.  That time turned out to be a transformative time in my life.  It was like a spiritual awakening.  Although, I cannot compare that time to a week of flu, there are some similarities. 

For instance, this past week, I did feel a spiritual renewal, if you will.  For some crazy reason I started to think about the word “faith,” and what it truly means.  Anyone who follows me on Facebook knows that I tend to post quotes about “faith.”  One such quote has been plastered all over the house and even in my car (those of you who have ridden in it lately can testify to this).   What is the quote you ask?  It is a quote by Voltaire, which, I feel, gets to the heart of the matter when it comes to faith.  He says, “Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe.”

This past week I asked myself:  Do I truly believe in this quote?  Can I say, with every fiber of my being, that I truly believe that I can change my stars?  I am reminded of the movie A Knight’s Tale where the father tells the son that he can change his stars and become whatever he wants to become.  The boy, who grew up in poverty, returns to his father after many years away, as a knight.  This would be unheard of for one marked to remain in poverty forever – without the proper lineage for knighthood.  Yet, he returns to his now blind father, under a new identity, and says about himself: “He wanted you to know that he changed his stars after all.”  It is at that moment that his father knows that the man standing before him is, in fact, his son.

I wonder if this is what faith is all about?  Is it the strong belief that, whatever your circumstances, you can change your stars?  What happens at that moment when you realize, like the father must have, that you always knew it would happen – that you kept the faith?  Is it at that moment that we are transformed?  Or does this transformation occur earlier – at some other point – thus, serving to lead us to the moment when we can say:  “YES!  I did it!  I changed my stars!”

So, my “spiritual renewal” left me with a need to put my faith to the test.  I realize that I sit here as a privileged person, living in sunny Southern California, in the United States, but even I have the need to test fate.  I sit before you now, a person who needs to affirm that I believe - I have faith – that I will change my stars and, hopefully, the stars of my loved ones.  I don’t know how it will happen, or when, but I will test my faith.

As I write in this blog, I will document my journey.  When the stars are changed, you will be the first to know.  So, won’t you come on this journey with me?  I wish to share it with you.  Who knows, maybe you will become inspired to test your faith.  Maybe you will change your stars, too…

Blessings and faith,

Summer