Out of this Darkness and Into the Light: Through the Path of Humility

“Out of this Darkness and Into the Light: Through the Path of Humility” by Rev. Summer Albayati

(UU Mystics Winter Newsletter, 2017)

One of my favorite books is Out of Darkness Into Light by Rahman, Elias and Redding.  This book blends, beautifully, various spiritual teachings from Islam, Judaism and Christianity.  One such teaching to help us find the light comes from the Sufi teacher, Saadi of Shiraz.  The story goes something like this:

“As a child, Saadi of Shiraz sometimes took part when his father, a revered teacher, spent the night in prayer with his devoted students.  One night all the disciples fell asleep during the vigil, but not the young Saadi.  Feeling quite proud of himself, he said to his father, ‘Look at them!  You might think they were all dead!’  To which his father replied, ‘Beloved son, I wish you also were asleep like them, rather than slandering them.” (p.128)

This beautiful story taught Saadi that the path of humility was best.  As Unitarian Universalists, sometimes we can be self-righteous and think we know the right way to be in the world.  Yet we find ourselves at a difficult time in our nation’s history.  It is a dark and confusing time for liberal faith traditions.  We now find that our values are being challenged and are at risk of being lost forever.  This may scare us as we embark on a new journey -- one that feels as though the light is disappearing -- leaving us completely in the darkness.  

It may help us to remember that to be humble is considered one of the paths out of the darkness and into the light for mystics.  Certainly for Sufi mystics, one must have humility to truly become one with the beloved -- a unity immersed in love.

Now is the time to ask ourselves this:  How do we cultivate a humble way of being when we may believe that we hold the only truth? How does humbling ourselves -- a type of surrendering -- give us strength at such a difficult time in our country’s history?  Can we let go and let God -- allowing ourselves to have a deep faith that love will prevail?  

Let us challenge ourselves in the months to come.  Prayer, surrender, self-reflection are all tools we can use to humble ourselves and perhaps find the light that will draw us out of this darkness.  May it be so.  Ameen.

What we are called to do

I come to this entry after experiencing a lot of death. How? I have been serving as a chaplain in my local hospital. The past month has been so transformational for me. I have been blessed to sit with families who must make the heart-wrenching decision to disconnect life support. I have held the hand of people before they entered surgery, as I prayed for healing. I have witnessed a daughter almost faint because her father "coded" and needed to be revived. I have swelled with tears in my eyes as I watched family members look up and say, "Why, God?"

What do I now know from all of this?

At times of crisis, we may cling to a more certain theological doctrine in which we view the illness as God's will. We may get angry at God for bringing all of this pain into our lives. But, for the most part, we are thankful for the hospital staff. I have been amazed to see how much compassion the hospital staff still has after seeing so much death. I am amazed at my own ability to well up with tears at any given moment. I have seen death - yes - but I have not lost a sense of the divine presence.

My sense that there is "something" out there has strengthened. Why, you may ask? It is because I see how much love is out there. Perhaps, for you, it is just that - love. Perhaps, for you, it is community that explains your theology. For others, it is an energy that we feel. Yet others describe it as God, Divine Presence, Spirit, Universe...

But, what I have witnessed is that this Divine Presence, Love, Energy or God has made me available to answer the code blue call after another patient I was visiting had fallen asleep -- leading me to be present for the family who needed me at that exact moment. I have been available to pray for patients moments before they entered surgery to remove a cancerous tumor or would welcome their new baby into the world -- via c-section -- many weeks too early. I have been able to hold hands with 50 people who needed prayers to help heal their wounded hearts - because a friend and loved one has died 5x that day, and now was on life support. I was the one available -- on call -- present to witness their pain and tears and need for hope.

This love I have found -- the one that calls me to be present -- whether it is a scriptural passage, a community of faith, or a feeling -- or whether it is an energy or one whom we call God...This love I have found renews my faith in humanity on a daily basis. I see hope in the eyes of a loved one. I find grace in the smiles of my own family who has had to take this journey with me, and love me when I am sad and angry because I struggle with what I have witnessed. This love I find in the smiles and warm embraces from my community of faith. More than ever, we humans, need our communities -- whether we find that in a faith community, a social group, or within our own families. We need one another. We need love. This is what we are called to do: Experience more love. "Faith, hope, and love...And the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13: 13)

Testing Fate, Testing Faith

This is my first post.  It is an auspicious day.  I am thankful for this day and this opportunity to share my reflections - my musings - on life.  I hope you will share this journey with me.  If so, may we learn from one another and transform our lives.  And so it begins…

Last week I was ill with a cold or flu.  Illness, to me, is a reminder to slow down and reflect on what is truly important.  As I lay in bed thinking (what else are you gonna do when not sleeping) I was reminded of another time in my life when I was spending a lot of time in bed due to illness.  That time turned out to be a transformative time in my life.  It was like a spiritual awakening.  Although, I cannot compare that time to a week of flu, there are some similarities. 

For instance, this past week, I did feel a spiritual renewal, if you will.  For some crazy reason I started to think about the word “faith,” and what it truly means.  Anyone who follows me on Facebook knows that I tend to post quotes about “faith.”  One such quote has been plastered all over the house and even in my car (those of you who have ridden in it lately can testify to this).   What is the quote you ask?  It is a quote by Voltaire, which, I feel, gets to the heart of the matter when it comes to faith.  He says, “Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe.”

This past week I asked myself:  Do I truly believe in this quote?  Can I say, with every fiber of my being, that I truly believe that I can change my stars?  I am reminded of the movie A Knight’s Tale where the father tells the son that he can change his stars and become whatever he wants to become.  The boy, who grew up in poverty, returns to his father after many years away, as a knight.  This would be unheard of for one marked to remain in poverty forever – without the proper lineage for knighthood.  Yet, he returns to his now blind father, under a new identity, and says about himself: “He wanted you to know that he changed his stars after all.”  It is at that moment that his father knows that the man standing before him is, in fact, his son.

I wonder if this is what faith is all about?  Is it the strong belief that, whatever your circumstances, you can change your stars?  What happens at that moment when you realize, like the father must have, that you always knew it would happen – that you kept the faith?  Is it at that moment that we are transformed?  Or does this transformation occur earlier – at some other point – thus, serving to lead us to the moment when we can say:  “YES!  I did it!  I changed my stars!”

So, my “spiritual renewal” left me with a need to put my faith to the test.  I realize that I sit here as a privileged person, living in sunny Southern California, in the United States, but even I have the need to test fate.  I sit before you now, a person who needs to affirm that I believe - I have faith – that I will change my stars and, hopefully, the stars of my loved ones.  I don’t know how it will happen, or when, but I will test my faith.

As I write in this blog, I will document my journey.  When the stars are changed, you will be the first to know.  So, won’t you come on this journey with me?  I wish to share it with you.  Who knows, maybe you will become inspired to test your faith.  Maybe you will change your stars, too…

Blessings and faith,

Summer